Recovery from Abusive Groups Page 11
the may. (Ironically, deprogramming usually costs much more because of the
security needs.) Minimal preparation both psychologically and informationally
can jeopardize this type of intervention and often does. But when this process is
done correctly by family and counselor alike, it is much more respectful of the
individual and less intrusive or traumatic.
I believe that exit counselors should be certified in some way. It will take some
work to establish the criteria for such certification, but it can be done.
Establishing a certification procedure and review board would also be a great
example to ex-cultists of how responsible professionals hold themselves and the
colleagues accountable.
Exercise- Leaving the Group
Write down the answers to the following questions: How did you leave your
group? What was it that you saw or learned that helped you leave? Try writing
down in chronological order the story of how and why you left. This process will
help you focus, stimulate critical thinking, and will provide a handy reminder
should your resolve get a little shaky.
I found all this exiting business to be very traumatic, embarrassing, and terribly
painful. The residual phobias and anxieties it left were frightening and exhaust
The most helpful words I heard during the intervention were "being in the group
was not your fault you were tricked." These words were reinforced by my
family and these words helped me not to get down in guilt and shame.
Phobias
An intervention may leave phobias. A phobia is an intense, illogical, or abnormal
fear. These phobias can last for years unless they are "weeded" out through the
mental discipline of reality testing. Phobias need to be tested and thereby
disproved (See Hassan, 1988).
I had a phobia of vans for a few years. Because I was once raped in a car and
because I was picked up off the street and shoved into a car by the
deprogrammers, I had a terror of walking past standing cars or vans for a few
years afterwards, until I got more mentally disciplined about testing the phobia.
This fear also decreased once I got my own car and did not have to walk to
wherever I was going.
Once on a business trip, I was being driven from the airport to my destination.
The driver got lost. I had such an extreme panic attack that I almost jumped
out of a fast-moving car. My mind was a cloud of panic. All I could do was to
keep repeating over and over to myself "I'm in control of my life I'm in control
of my life." Thank goodness, it worked.
the may. (Ironically, deprogramming usually costs much more because of the
security needs.) Minimal preparation both psychologically and informationally
can jeopardize this type of intervention and often does. But when this process is
done correctly by family and counselor alike, it is much more respectful of the
individual and less intrusive or traumatic.
I believe that exit counselors should be certified in some way. It will take some
work to establish the criteria for such certification, but it can be done.
Establishing a certification procedure and review board would also be a great
example to ex-cultists of how responsible professionals hold themselves and the
colleagues accountable.
Exercise- Leaving the Group
Write down the answers to the following questions: How did you leave your
group? What was it that you saw or learned that helped you leave? Try writing
down in chronological order the story of how and why you left. This process will
help you focus, stimulate critical thinking, and will provide a handy reminder
should your resolve get a little shaky.
I found all this exiting business to be very traumatic, embarrassing, and terribly
painful. The residual phobias and anxieties it left were frightening and exhaust
The most helpful words I heard during the intervention were "being in the group
was not your fault you were tricked." These words were reinforced by my
family and these words helped me not to get down in guilt and shame.
Phobias
An intervention may leave phobias. A phobia is an intense, illogical, or abnormal
fear. These phobias can last for years unless they are "weeded" out through the
mental discipline of reality testing. Phobias need to be tested and thereby
disproved (See Hassan, 1988).
I had a phobia of vans for a few years. Because I was once raped in a car and
because I was picked up off the street and shoved into a car by the
deprogrammers, I had a terror of walking past standing cars or vans for a few
years afterwards, until I got more mentally disciplined about testing the phobia.
This fear also decreased once I got my own car and did not have to walk to
wherever I was going.
Once on a business trip, I was being driven from the airport to my destination.
The driver got lost. I had such an extreme panic attack that I almost jumped
out of a fast-moving car. My mind was a cloud of panic. All I could do was to
keep repeating over and over to myself "I'm in control of my life I'm in control
of my life." Thank goodness, it worked.
