Cultic Studies Journal, Vol. 14, No. 1, 1997, page 55
about society, in those times, that warranted questioning. I yearned for some Truth, some
honesty-- some sort of guidance around which to structure my life. I was young, innocent,
good intentioned, and lacking direction. Around that time some friends invited me to attend
a workshop led by the “Enlightenment Institute” (a pseudonym). It was a 3-day weekend
designed to give participants a chance to pursue the Truth of Life in a supportive
environment. I jumped at the opportunity. The experience was good for me. I felt
supported. I liked the people.
This workshop led to my participation in other programs offered by the Institute. The focus
was on increasing one‟s ability to communicate and interact better with individuals and with
society in general. The techniques being used involved various psychotherapy practices
ranging from communication dyads to primal therapy. The overall program was based on
the philosophy that we are all perfect and that only our relationships needed improvement
and so the Institute offered a structure for my pursuit of a better way of life. At the same
time I began to form fulfilling and tangible friendships within the group of fellow students.
These friendships proved to be more satisfying than the ones I had been encountering in
college.
After several months of attending weekly and sometimes daily programs, I moved into the
Enlightenment Institute, a branch of a larger system which was controlled, from a distance,
by Louis. The center‟s directors were benign and friendly people. The leader lived 2,000
miles away and seemed to have little to do with the Milwaukee branch (I later came to the
opinion that he was chronically disorganized and unable to delegate authority from a
distance. This meant that he lost effectiveness when not on the scene). Unless the directors
of his various centers had a propensity for misuse of power, the branches were fairly
benign. Given what I have learned about cultic abuse and mind-control techniques, I have
yet to find unethical behaviors within those people. Many of them eventually left and formed
families and contributed to society. Yet, because of the very fairness of those running the
Milwaukee center, I became inattentive to the pitfalls in the greater system and to the
abuse that Louis would eventually bestow on me in the name of truth.
I lived in the Milwaukee center for 2 years. I met Louis once or twice during that time and
respected him from a distance only because he seemed to be the originator of some good
ways to handle life. Much later I found out that Louis had not originated the communication
techniques that we were taught. He also did not originate the ethics of treating people well
instead, he used these --the basic human codes of honorable behavior, a system on which
all long-living societies are based --as a cloak of deception.
The difficulty began when the Milwaukee center was closing down and I was at loose ends
as to what to do with my life. Most of the people living there went their own ways, going
back to school, joining other spiritual groups, and so on. I was invited by Louis to attend a
2-week retreat in California, which he was leading. As I had very little savings I took the
retreat at a reduced rate in exchange for future service. Louis solicited me to move to the
California headquarters of the Institute to further my growth and to do service work to
repay the cost of the 2-week retreat. I jumped at the chance. Later, a few students from
Milwaukee did find their way to California to live at Louis‟s facilities.
After moving to the ashram, as Louis renamed his center, situated in a remote desert
location, I was put to work as the cook. I proved to be a hard worker and was exceptional
at the work I was given. I was enamored by the life I was living. The people were both
friendly and intelligent. The communal atmosphere was as close to an ideal lifestyle as I had
ever dreamed of. We were young, healthy, and on a noble path. I loved the work and the
friendship. Soon I was given the job as the main bookkeeper in addition to cooking and
shopping for 25 people. The harder I worked and the more efficient I was, the more
responsibility I was given. This in turn increased my daily involvement with Louis.

Cultic Studies Journal, Vol. 14, No. 1, 1997, page 56
With this increased interaction I began to gravitate to the center of the group. Living in this
group atmosphere was enough to keep me happily involved, moving toward the core of this
crowd was an unexpected bonus. As a consequence of my involvement with Louis‟s inner
circle, I gradually came more deeply under the spell of Louis, who was a charismatic and
engaging person. He was seemingly insightful and alarmingly able to be in touch with
whomever he contacted. I was like a lovesick teenager, mesmerized by his very presence.
He gave three lectures a day where he taught the purpose of life, the Away of living based
upon Eternal Truth,” and answered his students‟ personal questions, often advising on
marriage, studies, profession, and relationships. He gave evening classes to a chosen few,
including me. He managed, through his charisma, to affect all who listened to him. I
believed him, I believed his teachings, and I believed his ethics. He presented himself as
God‟s agent, and I believed him to be that.
He was my minister and spiritual teacher, my guide through the “entrapments” of life. He
was my father, and we were his children. I want to stress here that he was also our
minister. He ministered his parishioners. He taught yoga, communication, and spirituality.
He taught “treating people well” and “not lying or stealing.” He taught surrender to God and
Guru --the Guru being him as God‟s agent. The subject matter of what he taught is not
what is important it is the fact he was our teacher. He could have been teaching
Christianity or Buddhism or Taoism instead of his brand of Hinduism. It is the relationship
not the teaching that matters in the case of cultic power abuse.
There were about 30 of us living in the isolated ashram (a number of miles from nearest
civilization), a small universe of Louis-ism. He was our benevolent dictator. This was not a
democracy, for all rules and regulations originated and died in his hands. If people did not
agree, Louis had them leave. People were flat out asked by Louis to leave if they disagreed,
as well as there being group pressure to leave if a person was not happy. The belief was
that each of us had free choice and no one was made to stay at this place. So, if you were
not happy, then go quietly in the middle of the night and leave us to live and worship as we
wanted. There seemed to be no stigma on disagreeing, leaving was only a logical
conclusion--why would someone stay when they didn‟t agree?
It happened that I agreed with the rules. They were not outlandish or dishonest. They were
more like preferences. I had always believed, in the early days, that if my preferences
changed or if Louis began to teach something I didn‟t agree with, then I could and would
simply leave. Later, I realized I did not have that option. But as it was in the beginning, I
liked living there since I agreed with the moral and ethical teachings. The people who chose
to stay were educated, intelligent, and well-intentioned people. It seemed a good life.
The Rules Change
Capable and intelligent, I soon found myself organizing the food as well as the accounts. As
a basically efficient person, soon I was teaching yoga classes in addition to my other duties.
I worked 12 to 15 hours a day (and liked it). I was proving myself to be a leader and
organizer. This innate ability also meant I was drawn closer and closer within the confines of
the inner circle.
Around the time Louis changed his name to “Swami Babaji,” I began to practice the natural
meditation techniques that Louis had brought back from India. These techniques, although
the backbone of Louis‟s teachings, were not in and of themselves abusive. It was the
manner in which Louis used this method to his advantage that began to destroy my life.
There is sometimes, in the anticult movement, a suspicion of any “new age” technique as
the source of abuse. From what I have studied, in many cases this may be true. In my
experience, however, it was not meditation techniques or types of prayer or manner of
eating that was wrong. It was the basic misuse of power. The meditation, in itself, was