Cultic Studies Journal, Vol. 15, No. 2, 1998, page 13
This group exhibited many other indications of aberrant or cultic beliefs and practices. When
I returned from Germany (I was in the military for part of the time my wife and I were in
the group), the leader had decided what kind of job I would have. Keep in mind, I had
managed to get through an undergraduate degree program at a Christian college, and I had
been employed as a counselor while in the military. But the leader had decided that God‘s
desire for me was to be a truck driver. The story about that is illustrative of some of the
thinking in the group. But it is a rather long story, so I won‘t tell it. [Doug Groothuis
encourages Patrick to tell the story.] ...OK, I will tell it in abbreviated form.
Illuminating Anecdote
Immediately following my return from Germany-in fact the following day-a truck-driving job
had been set up for me at EFD Express, which was a much smaller version of UPS. Despite
how unsuited I was for the work, I managed to do the job for two years, although I had
great difficulty. Anyone who has spent much time with me knows I have both a very poor
sense of direction and an extreme tendency to become tunnel-visioned when I‘m performing
a task. Because I was required to perform this work at a fast pace, it had become a rather
hazardous venture. I kept running into things. At first, they were small, relatively
insignificant things but on my last day of work, the situation abruptly changed.
I was wheeling around in the back parking area of a new car lot on South Colorado
Boulevard here in Denver in my step van. I was performing hard for God and for the group.
As I wheeled around a corner, suddenly I looked up and saw a gas pump floating off in the
distance. Flames began rushing around the sides of my truck. I had run over a gas pump
and I was sitting there disbelieving, stunned. ―This can‘t be happening, Lord!‖ I finally got
my senses about me and pulled away from the spewing gas.
The particularly interesting and significant part to all this-as I said, this was my last day on
the job --was in the response of the group. You see, it wasn‘t, ―Oh! What a horrible ordeal
for you!‖ Instead, it was, ―Well, it just goes to show that you had never truly accepted God‘s
plan for you, and the leader‘s vision for you to be a truck driver, and that‘s why this took
place.‖ I was told, ―Those flames were like the flames of Hell coming up around you because
you hadn‘t sufficiently submitted to God‘s ordained head over you.‖ Looking back, it felt like
one victimization on top of another. I wasn‘t allowed any expression of my real feelings. It
was one of those times to just knuckle under and pretend to submit to the leader.
Many other examples could serve to illustrate where the group was coming from. There was
the repressed and controlled manipulation of relationships. All relationships had to be
funneled in one form or fashion through the group and ultimately through the leader. There
was the firm control of any information that could threaten the leader. For example, while I
was in the military, I had started a graduate program in counseling through UNC (University
of Northern Colorado). Looking back, however, I realize that because this held the potential
for information that would prove damaging to the leader, he forbade my continuing
education in this field. I dropped out of school.
Leaving the Group
We had the ―Truth,‖ and that Truth would surely die without us. When we expressed
thoughts of leaving the group, we were repeatedly told we could expect some sort of
impending doom because of our spiritual rebellion. It seemed almost as if an
emotional/spiritual time bomb had been planted on the members if anyone left, it seemed
inevitable that it would discharge. We were conditioned to believe this, and in most cases,
our expectations appeared to come true. Members who left seemed inevitably to have
extreme difficulties with their attempts to hold on to their marriages, find new churches to
associate with, and keep their employment.
This group exhibited many other indications of aberrant or cultic beliefs and practices. When
I returned from Germany (I was in the military for part of the time my wife and I were in
the group), the leader had decided what kind of job I would have. Keep in mind, I had
managed to get through an undergraduate degree program at a Christian college, and I had
been employed as a counselor while in the military. But the leader had decided that God‘s
desire for me was to be a truck driver. The story about that is illustrative of some of the
thinking in the group. But it is a rather long story, so I won‘t tell it. [Doug Groothuis
encourages Patrick to tell the story.] ...OK, I will tell it in abbreviated form.
Illuminating Anecdote
Immediately following my return from Germany-in fact the following day-a truck-driving job
had been set up for me at EFD Express, which was a much smaller version of UPS. Despite
how unsuited I was for the work, I managed to do the job for two years, although I had
great difficulty. Anyone who has spent much time with me knows I have both a very poor
sense of direction and an extreme tendency to become tunnel-visioned when I‘m performing
a task. Because I was required to perform this work at a fast pace, it had become a rather
hazardous venture. I kept running into things. At first, they were small, relatively
insignificant things but on my last day of work, the situation abruptly changed.
I was wheeling around in the back parking area of a new car lot on South Colorado
Boulevard here in Denver in my step van. I was performing hard for God and for the group.
As I wheeled around a corner, suddenly I looked up and saw a gas pump floating off in the
distance. Flames began rushing around the sides of my truck. I had run over a gas pump
and I was sitting there disbelieving, stunned. ―This can‘t be happening, Lord!‖ I finally got
my senses about me and pulled away from the spewing gas.
The particularly interesting and significant part to all this-as I said, this was my last day on
the job --was in the response of the group. You see, it wasn‘t, ―Oh! What a horrible ordeal
for you!‖ Instead, it was, ―Well, it just goes to show that you had never truly accepted God‘s
plan for you, and the leader‘s vision for you to be a truck driver, and that‘s why this took
place.‖ I was told, ―Those flames were like the flames of Hell coming up around you because
you hadn‘t sufficiently submitted to God‘s ordained head over you.‖ Looking back, it felt like
one victimization on top of another. I wasn‘t allowed any expression of my real feelings. It
was one of those times to just knuckle under and pretend to submit to the leader.
Many other examples could serve to illustrate where the group was coming from. There was
the repressed and controlled manipulation of relationships. All relationships had to be
funneled in one form or fashion through the group and ultimately through the leader. There
was the firm control of any information that could threaten the leader. For example, while I
was in the military, I had started a graduate program in counseling through UNC (University
of Northern Colorado). Looking back, however, I realize that because this held the potential
for information that would prove damaging to the leader, he forbade my continuing
education in this field. I dropped out of school.
Leaving the Group
We had the ―Truth,‖ and that Truth would surely die without us. When we expressed
thoughts of leaving the group, we were repeatedly told we could expect some sort of
impending doom because of our spiritual rebellion. It seemed almost as if an
emotional/spiritual time bomb had been planted on the members if anyone left, it seemed
inevitable that it would discharge. We were conditioned to believe this, and in most cases,
our expectations appeared to come true. Members who left seemed inevitably to have
extreme difficulties with their attempts to hold on to their marriages, find new churches to
associate with, and keep their employment.
