International Journal of Cultic Studies ■ Vol. 10, 2019 3
Decision-Making Dilemmas
For adults who entered a cultic situation later in
life (first-generation survivors), the demands,
control, and absolute power of the group over
the individual can have a regressive effect,
infantilizing those who find themselves
dependent on the leader or group for making
decisions they previously might have been able
to make on their own (Ward, 2011). Healing
requires that they regain a sense of autonomy
around their decision-making and life choices
(Hassan, 1990 Singer, 2003).
Those who were raised in a group or brought in
at a young age (second-generation survivors)
face even more challenges around
developmental recovery (Goldberg, 2006
Kendall, 2016 Lalich &McLaren, 2018
Matthews &Salazar, 2014 Singer, 2003). With
no outside influence during their critical stages
of development, their personalities were formed
within the cult (Matthews &Salazar, 2014
Singer, 2003). As such, they have no former
identity on which to draw (Goldberg, 2006
Kendall, 2016 Lalich &McLaren, 2018 Lifton,
1963 Matthews &Salazar, 2014 Singer, 2003).
As a result, many second-generation survivors
may find choices overwhelming because they
have had no previous opportunities to make
decisions on their own (Matthews &Salazar,
2014). In interviews with second-generation
survivors, Matthews and Salazar (2014) found
that the extreme black-and-white thinking of the
cult makes decision-making a terrifying
experience whereby survivors search for the
“one right answer” (p. 194). The concept that
there may be multiple good choices or nuance to
choice seems foreign.
Although some clients may be eager to assume
responsibility for their choices and decisions,
others may look to the therapist as a surrogate
authority (Matthews &Salazar, 2014).
Counselors should resist making decisions for
clients and encourage them to develop autonomy
and competence around decision-making at the
same time, they need to be mindful of the
developmental limitations clients may have. In
such cases, clients may need scaffolding and
guidance in making their own decisions, with
the counselor walking clients through the
process of thinking through a choice.
A Black-and-White World
Both first- and second-generation survivors must
fight conditioning for absolute obedience
(Matthews &Salazar, 2014 Singer, 2003 Ward,
2011) however, second-generation survivors
also have to contend with the developmental
effects of such a rigid environment. Just as the
cult world is split into us versus them, good
versus evil, and right versus wrong, a child
growing up in a cultic environment may
experience a similar internal splitting that
associates the infantilized, obedient parts of the
child with the “good” group, and the
individuating parts that begin to develop as the
child ages with the “bad” outside world
(Goldberg, 2006). Many children have been
taught that any type of questioning or
individuality is rebellion or sin (Kendall, 2016
Lalich &McLaren, 2018 Matthews &Salazar,
2014 Singer, 2003).
The splitting of the “good” and “bad” parts of
self tends to lead to the development of a secret
self (Lalich &McLaren, 2018 Lifton, 1963
Matthews &Salazar, 2014 Rosen, 2014).
Because the secret self often holds the parts of
the survivor that craved freedom and autonomy,
the secret self is a valuable tool in the recovery
process (Matthews &Salazar, 2014 Rosen,
2014). It is important for counselors to strive for
the client to join with the secret self,
destigmatizing the desire for individual
expression and validating the authenticity of the
secret self. However, counselors also need to be
aware of the risk of continued splitting
(Goldberg, 2006 Lalich &McLaren, 2018). A
client who is unable to integrate the seemingly
opposing aspects of character may switch to
splitting off and denying the cultic experience in
an attempt to distance from the emotional pain
and turmoil. Rosen (2014) underscores the role
that friendships can play in helping the client
break out of rigid, black-and-white thinking,
stating that “learning to hear many opinions and
to digest or reject those opinions can be
enormously centering” (p. 24).
While the freedom to decide what to accept and
believe may be liberating in some respects, it
Decision-Making Dilemmas
For adults who entered a cultic situation later in
life (first-generation survivors), the demands,
control, and absolute power of the group over
the individual can have a regressive effect,
infantilizing those who find themselves
dependent on the leader or group for making
decisions they previously might have been able
to make on their own (Ward, 2011). Healing
requires that they regain a sense of autonomy
around their decision-making and life choices
(Hassan, 1990 Singer, 2003).
Those who were raised in a group or brought in
at a young age (second-generation survivors)
face even more challenges around
developmental recovery (Goldberg, 2006
Kendall, 2016 Lalich &McLaren, 2018
Matthews &Salazar, 2014 Singer, 2003). With
no outside influence during their critical stages
of development, their personalities were formed
within the cult (Matthews &Salazar, 2014
Singer, 2003). As such, they have no former
identity on which to draw (Goldberg, 2006
Kendall, 2016 Lalich &McLaren, 2018 Lifton,
1963 Matthews &Salazar, 2014 Singer, 2003).
As a result, many second-generation survivors
may find choices overwhelming because they
have had no previous opportunities to make
decisions on their own (Matthews &Salazar,
2014). In interviews with second-generation
survivors, Matthews and Salazar (2014) found
that the extreme black-and-white thinking of the
cult makes decision-making a terrifying
experience whereby survivors search for the
“one right answer” (p. 194). The concept that
there may be multiple good choices or nuance to
choice seems foreign.
Although some clients may be eager to assume
responsibility for their choices and decisions,
others may look to the therapist as a surrogate
authority (Matthews &Salazar, 2014).
Counselors should resist making decisions for
clients and encourage them to develop autonomy
and competence around decision-making at the
same time, they need to be mindful of the
developmental limitations clients may have. In
such cases, clients may need scaffolding and
guidance in making their own decisions, with
the counselor walking clients through the
process of thinking through a choice.
A Black-and-White World
Both first- and second-generation survivors must
fight conditioning for absolute obedience
(Matthews &Salazar, 2014 Singer, 2003 Ward,
2011) however, second-generation survivors
also have to contend with the developmental
effects of such a rigid environment. Just as the
cult world is split into us versus them, good
versus evil, and right versus wrong, a child
growing up in a cultic environment may
experience a similar internal splitting that
associates the infantilized, obedient parts of the
child with the “good” group, and the
individuating parts that begin to develop as the
child ages with the “bad” outside world
(Goldberg, 2006). Many children have been
taught that any type of questioning or
individuality is rebellion or sin (Kendall, 2016
Lalich &McLaren, 2018 Matthews &Salazar,
2014 Singer, 2003).
The splitting of the “good” and “bad” parts of
self tends to lead to the development of a secret
self (Lalich &McLaren, 2018 Lifton, 1963
Matthews &Salazar, 2014 Rosen, 2014).
Because the secret self often holds the parts of
the survivor that craved freedom and autonomy,
the secret self is a valuable tool in the recovery
process (Matthews &Salazar, 2014 Rosen,
2014). It is important for counselors to strive for
the client to join with the secret self,
destigmatizing the desire for individual
expression and validating the authenticity of the
secret self. However, counselors also need to be
aware of the risk of continued splitting
(Goldberg, 2006 Lalich &McLaren, 2018). A
client who is unable to integrate the seemingly
opposing aspects of character may switch to
splitting off and denying the cultic experience in
an attempt to distance from the emotional pain
and turmoil. Rosen (2014) underscores the role
that friendships can play in helping the client
break out of rigid, black-and-white thinking,
stating that “learning to hear many opinions and
to digest or reject those opinions can be
enormously centering” (p. 24).
While the freedom to decide what to accept and
believe may be liberating in some respects, it
