Cultic Studies Review, Vol. 4, No. 1, 2005, Page 7
The Interview Schedule
Interviews followed a semi-structured protocol which ensured that the same information
was obtained from all participants while allowing each person to ―tell their story‖ in full. The
interview schedule was developed in order to capture the 12 aspects of the qualitative
research interview as outlined in Kvale (1996, p. 27). That is, the interview aimed to
understand in a focused way the subject’s every day life world as it related to parental
alienation and the meaning of the alienation for them, in a qualitative rather than
quantitative form, with an emphasis on description of specific experiences. This information
was obtained through a sensitively conducted interpersonal exchange that because of the
deliberate naiveté of the interviewer allowed the subject to express ambiguous statements
and come to new and/or changed understandings. The interview was conducted in such as
manner as to produce a positive experience for the participant.
The interview had five major sections. The first section of the interview obtained basic
demographic information including age, gender, place of birth, and so forth. Section two
focused on memories of the marriage, the participant‘s relationship to each parent up until
the time of the separation/divorce, how the participant was told about the separation, who
moved out of the house and a description of the custody/visitation schedule through the age
of 18.2 The third section of the interview focused on the alienation, beginning with which
parent was the alienating parent and which was the targeted parent. Participants were
asked to list all of the different strategies used by the alienating parent and to provide
examples of each. The participant was asked to describe his/her relationship to the targeted
parent and how that changed over time, as well as the participant‘s relationship to the
alienating parent during this period. This section ended with a discussion of how the
targeted parent tried to counter the alienation, whether the participant knew about these
attempts at the time, and the perceived motivation of the alienating parent. In the fourth
section of the interview, the participants were asked about when his or her thinking
eventually changed about the targeted parent. They were queried about when they began
to realize that their feelings and thoughts about the targeted parent were induced by the
alienating parent rather than based wholly in reality. Whether or not the alienating parent
was ever confronted, whether the targeted parent was told about the realization, and what,
if anything, could the targeted parent have done to mitigate the alienation were discussed.
Any reunification with the targeted parent was described in full including who initiated it and
what happened. The final section of the interview entailed a conversation about the person‘s
life at the present, including what kind of relationship he or she had with each parent and
what the impact of the alienation has been. At the end of the interview a checklist was
reviewed in order to ensure consistency of data across participants.
Analysis
Audiotapes were transcribed verbatim. Transcripts were then submitted to a content
analysis in which each unique unit of thought was separated from the transcript and taped
onto an index card. Content analysis was guided by an inductive grounded theory approach
(Berg, 1998 Straus, 1987) in which the texts were read in order to identify the major
themes. Cards were then coded according to its essential idea (i.e., relationship with
targeted parent prior to the alienation, strategies utilized by the alienating parent, impact of
the alienation). In all there were 11 major categories including a category on the strategies
utilized by the alienating parent. These ―strategy‖ cards were further coded into sub-
categories that produced the major findings presented in the current paper. This paper also
draws on the data collected pertaining to their relationship with the alienating parent. All
quotes are attributed to the participant number so that the reader can determine the age
and gender of the speaker as well as whether his or her parents separated/divorced, age of
that event, and who the custodial parent was.

Cultic Studies Review, Vol. 4, No. 1, 2005, Page 8
The Findings
A Leader who Requires Excessive Devotion
Cults are organized around a leader, typically described as a charismatic individual who
maintains ultimate power and authority over the group. Within the cult the leader is
designated as worthy of devotion and awe because of his or her superior capacity to
comprehend the true nature of reality. Due to this supposed unique and valuable
knowledge, leaders are presented as able to understand members better than they
understand themselves. It is held that through great personal sacrifice, cult leaders are
willing to share this knowledge on behalf of the members who require the wisdom and the
guidance of the leader in order to function. In return, members are expected to reserve
their love and devotion exclusively for the leader, who has earned an elevated place at the
center of their emotional lives. Cult leaders have been compared to both psychopaths
(Tobias &Lalich, 1994) and narcissists (Shaw, 2003) because of their lack of humility in
presenting themselves as superior to others and because of their willingness to use their
charm and persuasion skills in order to exploit and unduly influence others.
The adult children who participated in the interviews described the alienating parent in
similar terms. In particular, they perceived the alienating parent as needing to be the center
of attention at all times and insisting on being the center of the child‘s emotional life. ―She
was the center and everything revolved around her.‖ (31) Another participant said, ―Mainly
I think she always wants to be your everything. She wants to be your center of attention.
And so she liked the fact that by making me hate him all I had was her.‖ (27) In fact, many
of the interview subjects described their parents as narcissistic, either using that label or
using precise descriptors that called that term to mind.
In cults, it is not enough to feel devotion to the leader members are expected to
demonstrate their devotion on a regular basis. Expressions of devotion include putting the
needs of the leader first, never questioning the authority of the leader, confessing
imperfections, allowing the leader to make all important decisions, and making public
declarations of faith and love. These actions reassure the leader that the member is fully
indoctrinated and further solidify the member‘s commitment to the cult (Lifton, 1989). In
many cases the expressions of devotion are public, with the aim of turning a public
declaration of devotion into an inner desire to be loyal to the leader. By requiring such
public assertions of faith and trust in the leader, cult leaders are exploiting the natural
tendency in people to want their beliefs to be consistent with their actions (e.g. Festinger,
1957). In this way saying becomes believing.3
This process also occurred in the families of alienation. The participants reported feeling
pressured to show their devotion to the alienating parent. Many described their relationship
with the alienating parent as one in which their parent‘s needs were felt as more real and
urgent to them than their own. They recalled staying home from social activities to tend to
their parent, to keep them company, to take care of younger siblings, or to perform
household duties. ―I did what I could do to make her life easier because her life was so hard
because of my father. That was my mantra, Mom‘s life is hard. I have to try to help her.‖
(40) They chose friends, hobbies, and eventually careers and spouses to please their
parent. Others reported that they grew up believing that it was their job to satisfy the needs
of their parent, exemplified in the statement, ―I was there to help her. It would make me
want to try harder to please her. I learned how to be amusing at a very young age.‖ (27) In
general, they experienced themselves as extensions of their parent, their primary function
in life being to take care of, please, admire, reassure, and be devoted to them.
A particularly important expression of devotion was an allegiance to and preference for the
alienating parent over the targeted parent. Some of the participants recalled being asked to
spy on the targeted parent and keep secrets from him or her. Many participants said that